10 Reasons to Quit Your Job

The below post has been a work in progress since last September when I decided the world of public accounting probably wasn’t for me. I always told myself that if I could come up with 10 valid reasons to leave my job, I would put in my notice. Unfortunately for me, this list was complete well before I had another opportunity lined up, and being the risk adverse accountant, refused to quit without one . Thankfully, that is no longer the case (after 8 years of auditing and I am finally leaving).
So here it goes:

1. 
   
   You have thoughts and desires of getting into an accident severe enough to warrant time off, but minor enough for no permanent damage


2. 
   
   You envy the homeless man on the street corner with his shopping cart, sleeping bag and radio who, instead of going to work, gets to hang out and enjoy a sunny Tuesday afternoon


3. 
   
   You sit on your bed each morning fully clothed for at least 15 minutes trying to talk yourself into leaving your house


4. 
   
   You have cried more than twice at work


5. 
   
   You secretly wish for food poisoning every time you eat sushi and you no longer shy away from the Monday All You Can Eat special at the dodgy looking joint with a funky smell


6. 
   
   You have seriously considered taking up smoking just for an excuse to leave the building at odd hours of the day


7. 
   
   You’ve considered marrying a wealthy gay man with a great apartment and in need of a green card just so you can avoid work for a few years


8. 
   
   You begin losing your hair and/or gaining weight from the stress


9. 
   
   Pregnancy would guarantee 4 valid months off…6 with bed rest


10. 
    
    You just don’t care enough anymore to put in the extra effort you always prided yourself on.
    

There you have it, my list of reasons that has been complete since March. Coming up with reasons to leave was easy, finding a job to leave for was a little harder.

Older Wiser and More Mature…or Just Sober?

Ah, the Fourth of July, one of my favorite long weekends of the year. A time for BBQ-ing, seeing friends and hanging out at the Lake. In years past it has also been known for the Havasu-like party down at Split Rock complete with sun, load music and an impromptu dance party spanning the tied up boats. It has been the location of multiple injuries, both physical and moral and great stories…some that I will never remember.

This past year, my sister, 9 month old niece and I hopped in the Bass boat (Dana’s “engagement ring”…she did technically ask for something sparkly and expensive) and headed down to enjoy the party. Unlike past years however, we anchored just off the main floating party, allowing for prime viewing of the debauchery. And it was from this safe distance that I obtained a whole new perspective on what I always thought was a good time.

What I had always taken as a P Diddy style boat party (hot girls, small bikinis, good music and expensive boats) in fact looked more like an underfunded hillbilly yacht club. Yes, the boats were expensive, but the music blaring from every third boat competed so fiercely with one another that none of it sounded good. And those hot girls in small bikinis with killer dance moves (myself included in years past) looked more like bright-white flabby high schoolers doing the Carl from Fresh Prince of Bel Air. It all just seemed so wrong and inappropriate…and even worse, this got me thinking - had it always been like this or had things gotten worse. Or even more alarming, was I just getting too old to enjoy the shenanigans that my parents always complained about. Maybe this is what people mean by getting old and wiser. I no longer needed that booze drenched scene to call it a good day.

But in reality I think the moment of doubt was really just a moment of soberness. Age had nothing to do with it…my parents and friends clearly showed me that later that night with the multiple tequila shots and bottles of wine. And so I have come to realize, I am stuck in an unfortunate conundrum –I am old enough to know better, but too young not to care.

Poor Planning

After so much travelling, I happen to pride myself on being able to pack light and right. In most cases I am able to get things down to just a carry-on…I managed to bring only a carry on for my two weeks in France and only a backpack for 2 nights in Minneapolis for work. But on this past trip to Tahoe for work, my light packing turned into a very expensive oversight. I will blame it on the lingering after effects of the plague…I clearly wasn’t thinking when I packed Thursday morning for the trip – work Thursday afternoon, dinner with client that night and work on Friday at the client site.

Being re-assured on numerous occasions that the client was casual, I opted to wear jeans on Thursday and brought a dress to wear Friday. I even brought two extra tops just in case. Unfortunately for me, I hadn’t thought through my options for dinner and upon seeing the client, followed by looking up the restaurant, I realized I was completely underdressed and needed to fix it ASAP. The solution –a quick Google search of shops in Incline Village for places that might sell dresses or dinner appropriate attire.

With a flimsy excuse for leaving work early, I drove like lightening to the nearest store to pick up a much needed outfit for dinner – which was less than an hour away from starting. Thankfully the store was not busy and the owner sensed my dread. Upon explaining the situation, she grabbed all possible options and got me started in the dressing room…I settled on a cute black maxi dress by Free People, that was actually on sale and something I would wear again. The only problem…thanks to my packing skills, I had only brought brown accessories. So what started as just a dress turned into a dress, black shoes, black clutch, black cardigan and colorful bandeau top to spice it up and tone it down (yes, the dress was a little too revealing for work). Two hundred dollars and twenty minutes later I was outfitted for the occasion.

With 15 minutes until the dinner reservation, I made it back to the hotel, got changed, fixed my hair, and touched up my make-up. And while I was 5 minutes late to dinner, at least I was appropriately dressed! Thank goodness for Google and an ample spending account. Too bad I can’t run through those expenses!

The Bubonic Plague

Blame it on the weather, blame it on jet lag, or in this case, blame it on the bubonic plague…my recent trip to New York was not up to par on the damage scale. That is not to say I didn’t have a great time, but let’s just say my normal shenanigans were kept at bay on this most recent adventure.

I had to be in New York for a training for work on Thursday and Friday…which meant of course I took the red-eye out Tuesday night for a day in Brooklyn with Anna, an afternoon of shopping with co-workers and scheduled a return flight on Saturday morning to allow for a Friday night out with Erin. It was flawless in its simplicity. However I did not account on one thing - coming down with the bubonic plague – a combination of stuffed up nose, severe aches and a headache that left me in a fog.

Wednesday morning I arrived at JFK and took a joy ride to Anna and Braden’s house for a morning of fun with the girls. To my surprise and joy, I got the bonus of seeing Braden as well (his hangover from the night before kept him home that morning). It was great seeing the Mark family, catching up like old times, playing with Emery and meeting the newest addition to the family, Addie. Anna and I were even able to channel our old Yoshi days with a sushi lunch and a few glasses of a mid-day red wine.

That afternoon, Braden and I shared a cab to the city – he to go to work at KPMG and me to go to work on 5th Avenue…I had a list of stores to check out and items I wanted to buy. I began at 44th and 7th and made my way downtown through Sample Sales in the Fashion District, Vintage Stores on 25th, the standards of Kate Spade, Anthropology and JCrew between 20th and 10th and ended the trek in SOHO meeting up with co-workers at Bloomingdales. On a normal day, I would have been weighed down by bags and exhausted from the exertion of swiping my credit card. On this day, I was exhausted, but empty handed. Shopping was an epic failure. I even tried to buy shoes to just get something, but I even failed in that…they didn’t have my size. So, when faced with defeat…we ate. I took the co-workers down the street to Dos Caminos for margaritas, chips and guacamole and we continued with Tapas at Boqueria just around the corner. Defeated, exhausted and starting to feel stuffed up, I called it an early night and was in bed by 10:30pm.

After two long days of training, I was mentally ready for a break and even more so, a proper catch up with Erin…we were set to meet up after work at her place for pre-game drinks, dinner just the two of us and then meet up with everyone else later that night for drinks and possibly dancing. The only snag in our otherwise perfect plan… what started as a head cold had progressed to the bubonic plague and even the bucket-size dosage of Sudafed and Tylenol Cold couldn’t keep it in check. Within 30 minutes of being at Erin’s I had gone through an entire box of Kleenex to match the bottle of wine we had drunk. We ended up heading to Tribeca for dinner where the conversation ran almost as freely and quickly as my nose…we called it a relatively early night at 11:30, beating her boyfriend home who was expecting the normal hot mess to arrive at 3am.

Bubonic plague aside, overall, it was great to catch up with friends and it was a nice reminder that I love New York not only for the craziness that it can hold, but also for being home to some of my favorite people.