This past weekend we went up to Pillsbury for Memorial Day weekend and to celebrate Oskar’s 7th birthday. It was a fun weekend but this post is not about the birthday but rather some terrible advice I gave and for which I need to publicly apologize.
Saturday night I made my way over to the neighbor’s cabin for some post dinner drinks on their deck. Their son Ian is getting married this summer and it sounds like he and his fiancé are going to try to start having kids right away. Ian had many opinions and thoughts on raising kids, and most of them should not be repeated or reposted in the sober light of day, but for one concern he raised I did have an opinion.
Ian is a self proclaimed neat freak who doesn’t like clutter or messes so he is worried about having all of the baby stuff and toys take over his house. And to be honest, this is totally a fair concern. I gave him my most recent hack and recommended buying a large basket to throw everything in at the end of each day to at least contain the clutter. And let’s be honest, this is absolute shit advice, to anyone.
The best advice I could have and should have given: just give up. Learn to let go of perfection, deal with the mess and lean into the chaos. The sooner you stop trying to fit the old mold of pre kids life with the upcoming tornado of child rearing the better off you will be. And yes, once you embrace the mess then buy that damn basket since it may make you feel a little bit more in control of the situation than you really are.
