A Year in Books

I have always been an avid reader. On our family cross country road trips growing up I remember sitting in the back of the suburban with my nose in a book (or the local map if a book was not available). And as one author put it, I would gladly read a car manual if there is nothing else available.

This year, whether it was the extended maternity leave or my discovery of the library app that lets me borrow library books on my kindle, I might have gone a little crazy with the reading. Below is the list of books I read in 2018, in order. 

Enjoy!

Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett
The Girl in the Spider's Web by David Lagercrantz

Scar Tissue by Larry Sloman
The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins
Less by Andrew Sean Greer
1984 by George Orwell
Bringing up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman
The Odyssey by Homer
The Future is History by Masha Gessen
A Separate Peace by John Knowles
Sing, Unburied, Sing by Jesmyn Ward
The Assault on Intelligence by Michael Hayden
Pachinko by Min Jin Lee
Three Daughters of Eve by Elif Shafak
Pick Three: You Can Have It All (Just Not Every Day) by Randi Zuckerberg
My Glory Was I had Such Friends by Amy Silverstein
The Hate You Give by Angie Thomas
A Terrible Country by Keith Gessen
I’ll Be Gone in the Dark by Michelle McNamara
The Awakened Family by Shefali Tsabary
Ninety-Nine Glimpses of Princess Margaret by Craig Brown
What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty
Fruit of the Drunken Tree by Ingrid Rojas Contreras
Social Creature by Tara Isabella Burton
Around the World in 80 Days by Jules Verne
The President is Missing by James Patterson and Bill Clinton
A House for Mr Biswas by V.S. Naipaul
All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr
The Bear and the Nightingale by Katherine Arden
Love and Death in the Sunshine State by Cutter Wood
The Girl Who Takes An Eye For An Eye by David Lagercrantz
Becoming by Michelle Obama
The Closed Circle by Jonathan Coe
Wonder by R. J. Palacio

Here Goes Nothing…

For those that are newer to the blog or those that have forgotten about my nomadic years of 2007-2009, I am a huge travel enthusiast and have made most major life decisions in order to see more of the world including: my profession, opportunities to work abroad and a spouse that is just as willing as I am to go someplace new. Over the years I sharpened my traveling skills, specifically my packing skills, narrowing down exactly what to pack so only the necessities were brought along and no space was wasted. A weekend required a small tote, a three week trip to Asia could be managed in a carry on. Packing for a trip was and still is one of the few skills I bring to my marriage. 

However, after having two beautiful kids my relationship with packing has changed significantly. If packing was a battle of space and efficiency I would definitely be losing. With kids you have to pack everything... and I mean EVERYTHING (I am pretty sure I packed the entire contents of Oskar’s room for our first trip abroad.) Unfortunately this is something no one warns you about and something you truly can’t appreciate or comprehend until you are stuck packing for a weekend trip with your newborn baby.

A few months ago, my friend Anjulee highlighted this issue after trying to pack for a weekend trip with her 10 month old daughter Lilah.  Her comment: forget Dr. Seuss’s Oh the Places You Will Go, one of us should write a book about all of the shit you have to pack when you travel with kids.  I made a mental note and began jotting down ideas and my formalizing my normal packing list.  Over Thanksgiving weekend the ideas officially formed into a rhyme/book and what started out as basic musing turned into a fully baked idea. 

And today I officially submitted my book to Chronicle Books to see if they are interested in illustrating and publishing my children’s book (for adults).  Chronicle Books is a local publishing house and have published some of my favorites including: All My Friends Are Dead and Goodnight Goodnight Construction Site.  And even better, they are one of the few publishing houses that accept unsolicited books. Due to this, I will only get a response if they like the book and their review process can take up to six months.  So stay tuned!  And if I don’t get a response, I plan to publish the book here in July!

Heather Does it Again

Last June my fellow mom friend spent the evening with Oskar, Martin and I photographing our evening routine.  The photos were GORGEOUS!  She subsequently took our holiday photos last year and she has once again made my day with the following photos of our family. 

I don’t know what filter or photoshop program she uses, but it is working… these photos capture the true Breuer Family.

The Accidental Jehovah’s Witness

I am a huge fan of holidays and traditions. I love celebrating other people’s birthdays and creating lasting memories. However upon reflection, it might not appear so…

Oskar is two and a half years old and we have yet to experience: Valentine’s Day cards, an Easter egg hunt, a birthday celebration with balloons, decorations and gift bags, trick or treating or sitting on Santa’s lap. Solely based on American standards, it appears we have become accidental Jehovah’s Witnesses!!

Okay, in all honesty while we don’t celebrate holidays the Hallmark way, we do celebrate them the Breuer/Gimbel Way... We have dyed Easter eggs with friends, picked out pumpkins at a pumpkin patch and gotten dressed up for the neighborhood Halloween extravaganza. We have started the tradition of celebrating Oskar’s birthday at the Lake every year with family, cocktails and hors d'oeuvres. We enjoy Thanksgiving weekend ever year with turkey on Thursday, goulash on Friday and a full day of baking cookies. And I wouldn’t want to forget all of our traditions for Christmas including picking out ornaments, cooking (and eating) the various special meals and receiving enough advent calendars to enjoy a new one each day (when you combine two families’ traditions of receiving advent calendars from the parents plus both your husband and sister-in-law decide to own and expand the same tradition it gets a little out of hand.)  Unfortunately for me, the “Christmas tree in a bar” tradition never caught on although I am hoping post- Christmas Eve service Irish Coffees does.

Okay, so while we might not have Valentine’s Day chocolates, Easter candy, Halloween tricks or treats or a photo of Oskar and Alva crying on the lap of some random man dressed up as Santa, I think we are still doing okay in creating lasting memories. And clearly Oskar doesn’t seem to notice or mind.  According to him every day is a reason to celebrate and receive presents…he thinks every box in the mail is a present for him and I am happy to keep it that way (even if that box might only contain diapers or light fixtures for the house).

Below are a few photos from Thanksgiving this year!

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Looking at trains with cousin Alton

Story time with Aunt Cindy

Oskar and Alva's first bath together. 

Oskar riding his new bike...because why wait for Christmas to get a bike?

Cookie time!

Happy Halloween... from the Goonies!

Mouth, Sloth, Chunk and Andy

From Camping to Glamping

A little over three years ago, Martin and I camped on our property at Timber Cove. We enjoyed the sunrises and sunsets from the bluff that would soon hold our family cottage. This past weekend we returned for my first night in said cottage. And while it is a fully completed structure, I would say the experience was more glamping than enjoying a weekend home. True, I slept on a bed with sheets and we had a working toilet, but that is where things ended... as Martin likes to point out, we still have a ways to go.

With no interior doors, we had to use shower curtains for privacy in the toilet and bedroom. And with no shower door in the bathroom (and the shower curtains being used elsewhere), we forwent showers all together. Our electricity and solar system has been installed however we must have blown a fuse since none of the outlets worked (and none of the light fixtures have been installed).

The goal of the weekend was to install a kitchen (which we did not fully achieve), so meals were prepared outside on our propane stove and eaten on our temporary picnic table on the deck. Dishes were done outside in a large bowl using water from the one spigot under the deck. We also used this water source to wash our hands and brush our teeth since the shower head sprayed water everywhere (due to the lack of the shower doors or curtain).

While Martin worked on the kitchen I entertained the two kids and tried to assist where possible (e.g. putting together the IKEA cabinets). Oskar got to see a few whales as they migrated south for the winter and had a fright when he was greeted by a deer on the grass. And true to camping / glamping form, Oskar had fun playing in the dirt and bathing in a bucket.

 Putting together the kitchen...

When we camped here three years ago, we enjoyed the sunset with a glass of champagne on the bluff in camping chairs. This time around, we enjoyed the sunset with a warmish beer on our deck in camping chairs. I hope next time I enjoy the sunset at Timber Cove it is on our deck of our house that has a fully functioning kitchen and bathroom... at that point I will break out the champagne again.

12 Week Recap - Round Two

It is amazing how much you forget after having a baby. I couldn’t remember anything from the first few weeks or months of Oskar’s life and am so thankful I captured some of the milestones and memories in a blog post over two years ago. The milestones definitely helped keep me sane these past few weeks and prevented me from expecting too much from Alva. So along those same lines, here is a recap of Alva’s first 12 weeks, not because I think I will need it for baby #3 but just so I can remember some of this crazy time. 

Week 1 - I rewatched the Oprah episode with Priscilla Dunstan and reacquainted myself with the five different types of baby cries. With Oskar, every time he cried I was convinced he was hungry and Martin swore he had gas or needed a diaper change... with Alva I was now adamant most cries were due gas; Martin was positive she was hungry.

Week 2 - The grunting returned and the googling began (mostly about sleep including: when does the witching hour begin? Around three weeks. What is a normal sleep schedule for a newborn? Awake for 45 to 90 minutes but no more than 2 hours at a time (in Alva’s case more like awake for only an hour at a time). As little as 10 minutes counts as a nap. Newborns won’t know day from night until two weeks and don’t try or expect a schedule until at least six weeks)

Week 3 - I started to lay down the foundation of a routine (unfortunately not a bedtime routine for Alva like we started with Oskar). No this was a routine for me which involved morning drop offs for Oskar at school with Martin and then Alva and I heading to Victoria Pastry Company or "VPC" for a latte and a croissant (my second breakfast of the day). I also started overbooking my calendar again with coffee dates and lunches and researching how to lose the baby weight.

Week 4 or 5 - I officially fit back into normal clothes... however given that I still have a large belly and a lot of extra loving, I am not sure what that says about my pre-pregnancy self... not sure that morning croissant is helping my cause either.

Week 6 - We got our first smile!

Week 6.5 - All hell broke loose.  Martin went up to Timber Cove for the day to work on the place and I had both kids alone for the first time.  We ate Cheerios for breakfast and snack and possibly lunch; all rules went out the window and by the end of the day the house was trashed. I seriously don’t know how stay at home moms or single parents do this! It didn’t help that Alva refused to sleep the night before and the whole morning. Thankfully Oskar was incredibly patient and helpful. He helped burp Alva and we turned me rocking Alva to sleep into a dance party.

Week 7 – We got 7 hours of continuous sleep!

Week 8 - Holy crap it has been 8 weeks?!

Weeks 9 – We spent most of the week trying to adjust to the jet lag and it wrapped up with another solo day of just me and both kids (thanks to Columbus Day and no day care). We took the bus to the Marina, found a new playground, grabbed a coffee and snack and picked up a birthday present for Martin.

Week 10 – I gave into the fact that Alva won’t nap anywhere but in the ergo baby or stroller...we might need to fix this as this won’t work in the long run. But at the same time she is sleeping from 7pm to 3am each night and then going right back to sleep until 7 so I don’t want to complain too much.

Week 11 – We hit a rough patch, not for Alva but my sanity. Call it hormones or lack of sleep but I was definitely low on patience with Martin. And I am sure Oskar picked up on it as well given his few meltdowns. The good news is that in the meantime Alva has found her hands and likes her giraffe lovie which helps her soothe and calm down. The bad news is she still hates tummy time and howls after just three minutes.

Week 12 - Despite our lack of trying, Alva has put herself on a pretty solid routine... asleep at 7pm and awake around 7:15am.  Like most things parenting-related I can’t take any credit. Call it due to or a result of being a second child, Alva is figuring life out with or without our help. 

On a personal note, week 12 (and soon to be 3 month mark) marks the transition from newborn to baby (at least in my eyes).  And while Alva is perfect in every way, I am one big bag of mess. My hair is falling out in clumps (I think this ends around 6 months); my stretch mark cream, to no one’s surprise has done nothing for the claw marks on my stomach and I keep wondering when my belly button will look normal again, if ever (based on photos from post Oskar it didn’t look too horrific around the 10 month mark). I have also developed flu or menopausal like sweats and chills (sans fever) and a hopefully temporary case of insomnia. I know I know, it took my body nine months to create Alva I need to give it time to heal and restart. I am just afraid apathy will sink in and instead of getting back to normal I will resolve myself to larger clothes, one piece bathing suits and a hand held fan for the hot flashes.

My Love Affair Continues

A little over ten years ago I spent a weekend in Amsterdam with Erin. I don’t remember much including how I got there, (I am assuming I flew) or much of the city or trip... I actually had to reread my blog to jog my memory, and according to that, I took a canal tour, which I have no recollection of, and we stayed in a cute apartment. I do remember a cute boutique shop where I bought a coat hanger, a Mexican restaurant claiming to be the best in Europe and loving the city, vowing to return.

We spent two days in the city (okay more like two nights and one and a half days since we missed our first train) and while a completely different experience than the boondoggle with Erin (or so I assume) the time spent there only solidified my love for Amsterdam. I am ready to move here. Or at least spend a month getting to know the city. 

Amsterdam might be known for its red light district and coffee shops (or at least it is in my circle of friends), however it is also incredibly family friendly. With the chance of rain in the forecast (it ended up raining both days) I spent some time researching things to do with kids in bad weather (since drinking in a pub was not really an option) and I was amazed by all of the activities and places for kids to go.  And when the rain let up, there were playgrounds on every corner it seemed for Oskar…There was even one out front of our Airbnb apartment. And even better there was a cafe on the corner where, according to our host, parents sit outside with a glass of wine to watch their kids play. 

But what really sold me on the idea of moving to Amsterdam with kids was our experience on the bus... as soon as I boarded the bus holding Oskar in my arms, two people got up to offer me their seats. And another got up to offer Martin, with Alva strapped to his chest, a seat. No need to ask, no need to stare at someone awkwardly until they noticed. The people seemed genuinely happy to give up their seats for kids. I have never experienced this before and am officially ready move.

Below are a few photos of our final two days in Europe.

Loving my Oskar snuggles on the train  ride to Amsterdam

Bubbles at the NEMO Science Museum!

First floor of five and already impressed...

Building something cool...

Different perspectives...

Who is bigger?

Can't forget about Alva!

Loving the rain and puddles. 

Enjoying the view from our apartment

Five times Three

On Friday, the four of us headed out to visit with Peter and Steffi for the afternoon followed by dinner nearby. Earlier that week Martin and I realized our five year anniversary celebrating our Germany wedding was that Friday, and given how close Peter lives to our German wedding venue, we decided to go back to where we rounded out the wedding tour. Dinner at Oma Keppmans.

Unfortunately we didn’t manage to get a single picture (Martin and I took turns walking with Alva and Oskar was off playing with Peter and Steffi’s two girls), but we did manage to get one the following morning.

As Martin so lovingly put it a few years ago in a slightly different context: five years later and nothing to show for it...other than some debt, wrinkles, grey hairs, stretch marks, and the two most beautiful and perfect kiddos a parent could ask for.

I hear an American!

Martin and I have been together for almost 10 years and we have been going to his parents’ house for almost as long. In all of those years I have never heard another person speak English let alone American English in his home town or nearby city. And if I was completely honest (if not somewhat shallow) I have never seen a group of people that I could potentially see myself being friends with (other than the people I have met through Martin). Which, when we discuss potentially moving back to Germany and specifically the area his parents live, this fact makes me a little nervous. All that changed on the Thursday of our trip.

After our successful trip to the goat farm and seeing Oskar play on the big playground, Martin’s parents suggested we check out the new playground in Iserlohn. We went on Thursday and my life changed completely.

Located on a man-made reservoir with a path around it, I was immediately reminded of the Lafayette reservoir. People were riding bikes, pushing strollers and out for an afternoon run. And even better than the Lafayette reservoir, this one had a cafe where you could grab a coffee or beer (we unfortunately did not, but I plan to if we ever make it back). From the parking lot it was a quick 10 minute walk to the playground. And I was definitely impressed. It was huge and pirate themed with a pirate ship and wooden palm trees.

Upon arrival Oskar and Martin took off for the big slide and I parked Alva in the stroller at the end of the low concrete wall. With at least a half dozen other moms seated along the wall with their strollers and bikes I had a good vantage point to check out the local scene. Upon sitting down I couldn’t help but notice the cool mom group and began to imagine myself as their friend. They were seated furthest away from me, most with blond hair pulled back into a messy bun or ponytail. The majority wore baseball hats and all had on sunglasses and casual t-shirts. They looked like they would drink mimosas at brunch and get dressed up for a martini or nice glass of wine at night. I wanted in.

It was shortly after (and right before Alva started crying) that I heard one of my future best friends speaking American English to her son playing just in front of me. Of course with Alva starting to cry and my BFF grabbing her son to leave I never got a chance to say hi, find out what she was doing in Iserlohn and make her realize I would be a perfect friend to have based in the US but could hang out with every time I came to town. I would even bring her favorite items back from the states. But alas. My opportunity was missed and my attempts to go back were unsuccessful due to previous commitments. I fully plan to visit this playground again every chance I get, I mean Oskar loved it and I would be a bod mom not taking him back to enjoy.

The Goat Farm

After some quick researching (okay extensive; this was the first “vacation” I have gotten in Europe since Martin and I got married and wanted to make the most of it) on things to do in and around Amsterdam with kids, one place kept on coming up: Geitenboerderij Ridammerhoeve. Everyone was raving about it! And even better, while just outside of Amsterdam it was also incredibly close to where we were staying on the coast. I added it to my list of things to potentially check out while abroad.

Turns out it was the highlight of the trip. I should never doubt multiple recommendations from mothers in the know. It will save me from the roller coast of emotions I had leading up to the actual visit to the farm.

Before we left San Francisco I was super excited based on the various recommendations I had read. I mean, who wouldn’t be excited about goats? That, plus it was something that I got to plan as compared to normal trips home where I have no input. The more I thought about it though, I began to worry that it wouldn’t be the success I was hoping for. I mean the moms whose recommendations I was following might have older kids rather than a toddler and even if they did have toddlers, Oskar wasn’t that excited about the animals at Tilden Park so he might not like this experience.

So I did a little more research and realized that it was age appropriate for a toddler... but even more amazing I learned you could do yoga with the goats on the weekends. You can imagine my disappointment knowing we were in town over a weekend but I wouldn’t be able to go due to family stuff.

The day before we went, I began to again doubt my decision to bring 6 adults out to the middle of nowhere based on some random people recommendations.  And the morning of our outing I had a brief moment of dread when we got to the location and found ourselves potentially lost. 

We were in fact thankfully not lost, we just needed to walk the ten minutes from the parking lot to the actual farm.  And upon first glance I knew it was going to be a fun day. I will let the photos speak for themselves but in summary, it took Oskar about 10 minutes to warm up to the goats and various other animals (although he never trusted the free range chickens) and after that initial time Oskar couldn’t get enough of the goats... he wanted to pet them, follow them into the barn and even go down the slide with them.

Greetings from Holland

This last week wrapped up our two week trip to Europe to see Martin’s family and introduce Alva to the German constituents. We mixed things up this trip and instead of spending the entire time at his parent’s house, we opted to rent a house on the Holland coast for a week with his parents, sister and sister’s new girlfriend before spending time in Germany. Martin chose the location of Noordwijk-Binnen and Meike booked the house. And it couldn’t have been more perfect... except for the weather.

Noordwijk is a posh, ocean-side town with large houses, a quaint downtown and beachside restaurants and swim clubs. And even better, it was a 25 minute drive from the Amsterdam airport where we flew into.  Even through the jet-lagged induced haze, I could appreciate the iconic Holland countryside we passed in the short drive - green fields offset by bright colored flowers, canals along the road, old windmills, and families on bikes. The only thing missing was a woman in wooden shoes and a funny hat selling Gouda with her cow.

While the Weather was not on our side (heavy winds and rain most of the week) we managed to make the best of it...Oskar and Martin spent a day at the beach, we wandered through town,  and Martin and I were able to sneak away for a day date for French fries and groceries.

With no obligations and the relaxation of us all being on holiday, the week flew by. And before we knew it, it was time to drive the three hours back to Martin’s parent’s house in Germany.

Our international traveler - getting ready to go to the airport at 5:30am

Checking out the town

Do these shoes make my feet look big?

A little rain won't stop these two from having fun

A beautiful day at the beach...

Local adventures

I am not sure exactly when it started but a few weeks ago we began calling our errands “adventures” to bring a little joy to the otherwise mundane tasks and to help encourage Oskar to get dressed and out the door. Since then, we have been on a few adventures, some real, some unexpected and some just an errand repackaged as something new and fun.

The first of our adventures was on a Sunday and it was to the Tile and Flooring store in Hunters Point to pick out tile for Timber Cove... we got there before they opened and were the first ones in the door. With Alva in the stroller (at two weeks old) and Oskar and Martin running around we somehow managed to pick out tile fairly quickly. It took a little longer to actually order the goods so while I managed the actual purchase Oskar and Martin played in the display bathtub. It kept them both happy, entertained and contained for at least 10’minutes.

The following week we had a true adventure to Tilden Park to see the farm animals and ride the steam train with Grandma and Grandpa. Oskar was a little overwhelmed by the animals, but we kept ourselves entertained by watching my dad trying to feed the cows, pig, sheep and goats his old celery.  Apparently the animals are local food snobs; they constantly turned down our limp celery in favor of fresher greens. From the little farm we took the short drive to the steam train where Oskar was super excited and exclaimed every few minutes first “we are taking the train” followed by “we took the train.” Unfortunately Alva was a little overwhelmed so Martin and Alva stayed behind while Oskar and I, along with Grandma and Grandpa took the loop.

 A dead car battery and need to drive around for a while led to our adventure to Cavallo Point with Jeffrey and Kyrian (who were nice enough to give us a jump). We drove over Sunday morning so we could charge the battery and allow the two boys to ride their bikes and explore the wide open spaces. And we refilled our stomachs with lunch at the restaurant.

The following weekend my parents came over and we went on an adventure through Chinatown in search of dim sum. The wait was too long at the first restaurant we tried so we ended up at a counter-service restaurant deeper in Chinatown with limited seating and nothing but locals. My dad managed to make an impression by ordering the chicken feet, while Oskar made friends with the toothless older woman waiting for her food. She didn’t say a word but made enough hand gestures and facial expressions to get her point across... at least I think she was saying Oskar had a good appetite!

And finally, our local adventures ended with the biggest one, a trip to Timber Cove for Saturday night. It began with a monumental meltdown by Oskar in the morning because his banana broke into two pieces, followed by a road side stop five minutes before Timber Cove to clean up some puke (Oskar’s), feed Alva and pee on a tree (Oskar, thankfully not Martin).  The night ended with both kids crying at bedtime in our hotel room. Thankfully the time actually spent at the house with Grandma and Grandpa was really fun (they drove up that day to drop off the newly purchased tile and help supervise the kids while Martin worked).

Next up, a true adventure to Europe with the four of us!