Turns out that cold I had been fighting since late September was in fact pneumonia so the break is a bit foggy. Details are limited but here is what I got:
We went to Nevada City for a mountain bike race.
We had a few nights in Dunsmuir where the kids and I took down the wallpaper in the back bedroom, they swept up the leaves and Martin took the kids on a few bike rides and hikes.
Friday was German Reunification Day so the kids had the day off of school. With Martin supposed to be gone I had planned a trip to Monterey. And even though Martin turned out to be home, he opted to take advantage of the empty house for two days and decided to not join us.
Although only 2 hours away for only two nights, it was an adventure. I picked the kids up from school and got to experience the daily hustle that Martin experiences weekly: getting the kids from their school in the Castro to Oskar’s soccer practice in West Sunset at 4:15, then Alva’s gymnastics practice 10 minutes away at 4:30, then back to soccer after gymnastics ended at 5:25 before everyone was picked up at 5:30.
From the daily hustle, we started the drive south with a pit stop for snacks at CVS, In n Out for dinner and gas for the drive. This was followed shortly with another pit stop just south of Santa Cruz for Oskar to poop (like clockwork) and add more oil to the car (which I turned into a teaching moment). We didn’t get to the hotel in Monterey until 9pm, and before they saw anything, the comments began that they liked Monterey.
Friday morning we enjoyed the standard breakfast buffet and juice bar and then made our way over to the aquarium. I am not sure they learned anything but I think they had fun. And after four hours Alva was done so we called it a day and headed back to the hotel.
With all of us still not feeling 100% (the house had been struggling with colds since the beginning of school) we spent a few quiet moments on the bed reading and drawing followed by some hot tubbing and pool time.
The day wrapped up with s’mores at the hotel fire pit, lawn games and finally pizza on the bed watching our family’s favorite movie Around the World in 80 Days.
Saturday morning we had a few final snuggles in bed before driving home for Oskar’s soccer game.
Weekend dad, divorcee dad and now Disneyland Dad. I have been called them all and I have embraced my status as the parent who typically doesn’t “show up” until the weekend and, when left alone, all rules are out the window. I am not sure if it is because of my tendency to go crazy that Martin doesn’t feel comfortable leaving for long periods of time or the fact that he doesn’t normally leave for long periods that I go a little crazy, either way it doesn’t really matter.
Martin was going to Norway for 10 days so we were going to go crazy. He was going to leave on Friday morning (September 26), the kids had the following Friday off (October 3) and the only thing other than school that we had to do was a soccer match on Saturday (October 4) that Martin would aim to join after his flight landed. This meant I had potentially two weekends to plan some fun.
I crowdsourced my colleagues and leveraged ChatGPT for suggestions and landed on Monterey Bay Aquarium for the second weekend (it would make for an easier drive to the soccer game on Saturday) and I was trying to figure out what to do for the first weekend. And I hate to admit it, but Disneyland was top of the list… we could fly down Friday night or Saturday morning, have a full day in the park and be home Sunday midday to prep for the week ahead. It sounded feasible and somewhat “affordable”.
I didn’t want to plan too far in advance, so this was going to be a last minute decision. Little do the kids know, but a comment they made on Wednesday before Martin left changed everything. We were talking about Disneyland and the Incredicoaster. Alva was super excited since, with shoes, she was now tall enough to ride the roller coaster (hence my idea to take them to Disneyland). She was even more excited to take her first ride with Martin and specifically said so over breakfast.
With her wishes stated, I couldn’t in good faith take them to Disneyland without Martin. Thankfully I hadn’t booked anything. And in a twist of fate that made me grateful for waiting until the weekend to announce my plans, Martin ended up having to cancel his Norway trip… it would have been a very bad look if Martin cancelled and we turned around and left him for a weekend at Disneyland.
Apparently my last post was a bit depressing and alarming for those that have been here for awhile. Let me be clear, I am still carefree and still like to participate in my fair share of shenanigans. So while I won’t be to the levels I was in my 20s or even 30s (which is probably a good thing), I still know how to have fun.
For example, Redwood City hosts an Oktoberfest every year and I have made it a point to host a finance happy hour at the event each year. After a year of building up my professional reputation, this year I felt I could cut loose a little more... I danced the chicken dance in front of my team and came in second place (out of 12) for the beer stein holding competition.
But even more telling, I enjoyed a very hard and long laugh when my Assistant Controller Angie snuck the following two pictures into my 40 plus person All Hands meeting that I hosted the morning after the party. The chicken hat was purchased courtesy of Angie and my SOX director Nancy.
My lovely friend Erin was kind enough last birthday to share a scientific study that concluded people don’t age sequentially but rather in bursts, one of which occurs when you are 44 (the second at 60).
And I am here to vouch for the study. I have aged a lot these past 365 days: emotionally, physically, mentally, visibly. If you have been reading the blog for the past year I am sure you have also noted a slight shift in tone from wild and carefree to scattered, anxious and low energy.
So I am happy to report that I am officially done with 44 and am ready to move on to the second phase of this decade. And I started it off right with a nice family dinner at home for my birthday and two amazing presents from Martin and the kids. I don’t put much stock in presents because I know I can be difficult to shop for and typically buy everything myself, but he truly nailed them this year.
He got me a mug for tea that I had checked out at a shop in St Ives. I didn't think too much of it since I didn’t think Martin 1) had noticed or 2) bought it there or made a note to buy it later, so extra props to Martin on this one.
And even better, he bought me toasty pie makers for camping! Which is awesome on its own but even better given our most recent camping trip and the kerfuffle we had over packing a salad bowl.
The back story: when we went camping the last weekend before school started, I made my normal list of things to pack including a tablecloth, hand broom and salad bowl and while packing I mentioned out loud that we needed to pack these items so I wouldn’t forget. For even more background, this camping trip was to be a repeat of last year's trip Martin took with just the kids and one where they had a great time. In contrast to my current year packing list, the previous camping trip required just the tent and sleeping bags and they figured the rest out as they went. In Martin’s own words, last year was a bit chaotic but still fun; they made it work. My request for the salad bowl made him question the whole camping trip or at least one that included me. It was apparently becoming too much “work”. And yet when we got there, the mom from the other family who joined us mentioned that she forgot to pack their salad bowl but wished they had (thankfully we could share), Martin was the first to use the hand broom, and the tablecloth made our campsite the one to be at.
So when I opened up the toasty pie makers, Martin commented that they were along the lines of the salad bowl (utterly not necessary) but he was on board and supportive. And that, my friends, is marriage… at least in this household.
It all started with the desire to go to the US Open. And from there it grew into an urge to relive our mid-twenties when Erin still lived in Manhattan and I would take the red-eye for a weekend of shopping and shenanigans. And then we sprinkled on a bit of work to justify the midweek trip.
We accomplished all three with a few reflections:
I loved the whole US Open experience. We got there early to wander the grounds before the matches and enjoyed a few (too many) Honey Deuces, we made friends with those around us (including my seat mate, a 12 year old girl who wants to eventually play at the Open and who also gave me a big hug when Erin and I left early (see previous note about the too many drinks) and it was inspiring to watch these incredible women play the best tennis (I am becoming a huge fan of women’s sports, especially after the Valkyries game with the kids just the weekend prior).
It was really good to see my NY colleagues in person and I realized how much I have grown my relationships at the company over the past two years
And while we did have a day of shopping and beverages on Friday it was definitely not the same as when we were twenty. And that is okay. The shopping was a bit more high end, the drinking was a lot more low key and we ended the night back at the hotel, in bed, watching a marathon of Bones on TBS with the subtitles on. And it was perfect.
So while I still love New York, I would have been just as happy catching up with Erin in her new home in Dallas. The allure of energy, good restaurants, vibrant bars and shopping isn’t what it used to be. A good night sleep and a proper catch up, that is where I am at these days.
One of the benefits of living in the city is access to all of the amazing art exhibits, performances and cultural events. the kids love the MoMa and Oskar loves listening to any band playing outside of the bars and cafes in North Beach.
And so when our friend invited us to an event at an art gallery near Union Square, one where she would play her violin while the artist, Lana Fly, painted, it seemed a perfect chance to expand their cultural experiences. Plus it was only a 2 hour exhibit, the painting itself was broken up into two ten minute “shows” and we promised gelato afterwards.
I found it to be a cool experience. Julia is a beautiful violin player and the paintings were erratic and spontaneous to go along with the music. The kids. Less than impressed. Oskar’s face says it all.
And this year we remembered to get the kids showered and hair cut beforehand.
Our summers are normally just 7 weeks, with three of those spent on a vacation either in Europe or split between locations in CA (Pillsbury and Dunsmuir). With the wedding in mid June and resulting early end of the school year, this summer seemed especially long with never ending summer camps and logistics. But also full of visitors and fun.
We had Harry Potter camp, bike camp, soccer camp, gymnastics camp, tinkering camp and mermaid camp / mountain bike camp
We bought a lot of sunscreen
And just look at her strong and fun and outdoorsy and sassy and girlie and optimistic personality all bundled into one. Her birthday party planning is in the works… she wants a Tour de France themed afternoon complete with a bike ride through Golden Gate Park followed by baguettes and croissants (no cupcakes or cakes since they are not in line with the theme). She clearly has a vision.
We knew logistically it wasn’t going to be easy. Meike and Regina were getting married in Chemnitz two weeks before school got out. But we would never miss this, so with a plea and a notice to school that we were pulling the kids out early, summer started June 12 and we were off to Europe for a 3+ week vacation.
Below are those stories.
After 3+ weeks travelling back in Europe, I had a few parting thoughts from the overall trip:
I was blown away by the sheer volume of people out and about drinking in London on any given afternoon. They were literally spilling out of the bars and drinking in the streets. I had truly forgotten what a large city felt like. And it was a good reminder that SF really isn’t a big city nor has downtown really recovered.
I have a bad habit of wanting to buy property every place we go and the kids leave every location asking to go back.
I really miss living in Europe
I left with a scratch in my throat and the onset of a head cold. Would I be the super spreader of some new disease? Is this from a ghost from the British Museum, or is my body just physically revolting from me trying to leave.
I dress much better when I am on vacation, but that could just be the better weather
And finally, my favorite comment of the last few days of the trip… when hoisting my overstuffed suitcase into the trunk of the uber to get to the airport, my uber driver exclaimed in his thick Eastern European accent “Oh you’re strong!’”
Until next time Europe!
My previous trips to London have felt like a bit of a blur. I have memories of being there but I never felt like I truly knew the city or had a good handle orientation-wise whenever I visited. It has always been slightly out of reach, unknown and untameable to me (even though I have been there over 7 times).
After the five days with the family and the three days by myself I finally feel comfortable making my way around the city and have a good feel for the neighborhoods. It could be thanks to google maps, it could be because I was in charge of planning each day and getting us to each location (previously I was merely a visitor to someone else’s plans and home) or it could be due to the lower consumption of alcohol as compared to previous trips. We may never know.
With two days just to myself, I wanted to keep my plans open. I didn’t book any dinner reservations at the trendy new restaurants, I didn’t book tickets to a musical or show and I didn’t reach out to any friends since I didn’t want to commit. I wanted complete freedom to do what I wanted, when I wanted. The loose outline: some shopping, a museum or two and then work on Monday. Irish John also provided a few casual bar and restaurant recommendations for near my office and hotel.
With no formal plan, I managed to do a lot:
Saturday afternoon and evening included shopping at a vintage Burberry shop, Fortnum and Mason for buying tea, a quick detour to buy a book for my mom and finally taking a break for dinner at one of Irish John’s many recommendations, Kiln.
Sunday started at the British museum where I enjoyed over two hours of unhurried time wandering through each and every space, thankful that I did this alone so I could take my time. While there were things the kids would have loved, it was overall just too much space, too many things and too many people. Doing it solo allowed me time to walk past displays that didn’t interest me and allowed me time to stop and relax at those I was drawn to. I had also recently purchased and read The Ghost Stories of the British Museum book, which helped give me a background on a handful of pieces including where they came from, why they are important and yes, how they also might be haunted. Unfortunately it also prompted brief moments of sadness thinking about how most items don’t belong in a museum in London but rather back in their home countries.
Post British Museum, I made my way to a late lunch at Drunch followed by more shopping for clothes (I wanted a new outfit for the office the next day and wanted to check out some local shops), a quick drink at the Coral Room (more for a break in the heat, a chance to sit down and drink some water, and yes enjoy a martini), and then on to another Irish John recommendation, the Barbary.
Monday was a full day of work and then a quick bite at another John recommended restaurant followed by a final night cap at the hotel bar.
I wrapped up my stay on Tuesday morning with a quick trip to the Tate before heading to the airport.
It seems that wherever we go, Martin and I always feel the need to check out the real estate. Cornwall was no different, except that we still think about buying the cottage on the coast and officially giving up the city life for the Cornwall life. Our week in St Agnes was nothing short of perfect.
There were beaches and bogey boarding, bike paths and country lanes, bakeries and pubs within walking distance and a general exhalation that allowed us to slow down and enjoy each day. It also helped that it was a heat wave so the weather was nice.
After an amazing week on the coast, no one wanted to leave, and yet we had no choice. Martin and the kids had a flight to catch to Germany that Saturday afternoon. But we did have one final stop. Come to find out Stonehenge was just off the highway that we had to take to get back to Heathrow. It seemed wrong to miss it being so close.
But we were also close on time and with traffic, we had little to spare to fully enjoy the historical site. So we did it American style instead:
1:10 arrival
1:20 purchase tickets
1:35 photos
1:45 on bus back
1:55 back in car to head to airport
It was a bittersweet goodbye to the family as they headed off to Germany for a week with Oma and Opa. I was heading back to London for two days of fun and a little work.
It was on the last and final day at Cornwall that I learned a very important lesson: never let a 7 year old put on your sunscreen.
I wasn’t sure what to expect but Glendurgan Garden was another guidebook suggestion and local recommendation and they had a hedge maze similar to the Triwizard Tournament. I figured we would spend an hour or two at the garden before grabbing lunch and going to the beach. At the entrance we were given yet another book for the kids to complete and we spent another 15 minutes before even entering the garden to find every item and complete every task.
What was expected to be an hour walk turned into a full day affair. With time spent coloring in the apple shed, checking out the bees, the old fashioned “swing”, ice cream and the beach, and finally the maze. We spent 4.5 hours exploring the grounds and the kids had so much fun it reminded me of Buschart gardens in Victoria, BC
Back to Chapel Porth for cartwheels on the sand and general happiness all around.
Fun fact, if you are a member of the beach club parking is included. And if there is no parking you just leave you car double parked with the keys on the dash and someone will move it for you if needed.
Martin took the kids on a bike ride in the afternoon so I could do a little work
