Martin and I have tried, twice now, to go to Napa for a romantic weekend. First, in November, which we had to cancel because he was sick. And just recently this past weekend, which we also had to cancel because my parents were sick.
But after the month I have had, I wasn’t going to let that stop me from getting away. Every man and woman for themselves… I left Martin with the kids and finally took the trip solo.
While it might sound heartless, let me try to explain: On January 4 my company announced that it would lay off approximately 10% of our workforce. It unfortunately wasn’t a surprise to me, I had been working on the project since October but it still hit home that day. For the following four weeks I would sporadically and unprovoked break down crying. And just as I was starting to get a grip on life again, this past week I found out my boss, the whole reason why I came back to this company and stayed at my job for so long, was being let go as part of the restructuring plan we had both been working on for months. I was devastated, shocked, numb.
I needed a break from life, a chance to let me process what was happening, go through the stages of grief and not have to pretend everything was okay. I told Martin Tuesday night that, if the worst happened, I would need to disappear for a few nights. Shit hit the fan on Wednesday afternoon and that evening I told the kids that I was going away for two nights.
With last minute flights being too expensive and the weather limiting my options, Thursday afternoon I found myself alone at the very same resort I had originally planned to be at with Martin but for very different reasons.
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